so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
That accounts for only three of the penises
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Randomize
