At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
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