i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
I'm bleeding and have questions
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
Randomize
