i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
Randomize
