Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
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