Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize
