I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
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