He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
Randomize