Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
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