I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
Randomize
