The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
Someone stole a lamp last night.
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
Randomize