Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
I think a kid would responsible me up
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
the raccoons are back...
Randomize