Your face is a jimmy john
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Randomize
