please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
Randomize
