HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
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