Your mouth is God's brothel.
I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
