the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
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