let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
So vagazzling was a success
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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