We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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