At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
... I threw up in the shower this morning
You were "I'm not drunk" drunk.
I was feeling sad so bedroom vodka seemed like the best solution at the time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Randomize