I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
Randomize
