I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize