with your own penis?
talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
Randomize
