Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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