Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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