I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
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