my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Randomize
