I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.