We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
sarcasm needs its own font
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
Randomize
