just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
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