so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
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