Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize