I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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