After last night, I could never be a politician.
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
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