one two three fourrrrnication!
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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