Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
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