My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
I will be naked everywhere
I can't turn off my feet"
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
Randomize
