Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
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