and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Randomize
