Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Randomize
