Buhtt sex?
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
Naked. naked and bneed help.
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
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