is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
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