can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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