so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Confessions From 23 People Who Have Been Hiding Terrible Secrets
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30