I woke up wearing no shirt sleeping next to a half-eaten grilled cheese.
Well did you call the grilled cheese yet? Or r u waiting the usual 3 days?
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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