She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
Randomize
