he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
Randomize
