sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Randomize
