There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Randomize
