so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Randomize
