Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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