Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize
